08 February 2012

First post in a long while

Jamie told me that I'm long overdue for a post. She's definitely right. :)

Quite a bit has happened in the last little while. Lots of good things, and plenty of bad. All in all, I think it all worked out for the best.

Today, however, I'm feeling bright and shiny... so I'm going to focus on the good. ;)

I'm dating a wonderful, beautiful, and absolutely amazing girl. Her name is Jamie, and she is everything I have ever wanted. She gets me, and she respects me. She is unique, and funny. She has passions, and she genuinely cares about everyone she meets. She is smart and thoughtful, and she puts other people's needs in front of her own. She is the 6th sister out of 7 sisters... all born in a row. And she has a little brother born right at the end. Her family is wonderful. They are LDS, and she still respects the Church... she just can't find where she fits in the Church, while still being gay, and knowing that she can't change it. She respects that I am still active in the Church, and that I'm still trying to figure out who I am, and where I fit in this world, and within this Church. She respects it, and we frequently talk about our feelings about it.

She is wonderful... and I can't even begin to explain how lucky I am to have her in my life right now. She is a positive influence in my life. She brings out what is good in me, and she pushes me to be a better person, to be a better me.

She has her scars, and she has her baggage. But we all do. And I have more baggage and more scars than anyone else I have ever met. And we get through it. We get through the everyday struggles that girlfriends have. We have our share of arguments, and we have our share of hurt feelings. But in the end, we make up. We look at each other and see that being "right" wasn't what was important... its her. She is what's important. Us. Our relationship, and the love we have for each other. That is what's important.

And to anyone who actually reads this blog... and honestly, I highly doubt anyone does... but if you do (and especially if you know me), I am coming out right now... not coming out and saying that I'm gay, because I'm not. I still love men. And I love them a lot. So I'm not gay, and I might be bi... I really dont know yet... but what I do know, is that I love Jamie Merrill. And I'm not ashamed to admit it. So I'm dating a girl. So what? She's beautiful, and she certainly smells better than a sweaty, smelly guy. And her face doesn't scratch me when I kiss her. She dresses better than a guy, and she'll rock out to Taylor Swift with me anytime I want. And we can share clothes. 5 very good reasons to date women... just throwing that out there. ;)

In other news... the skiing sucks this winter... and that's just downright depressing....

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